The world is turning into a very horrible place going by all the stuff one reads in newspapers. Seeing people acting so inhumanly is beyond comprehension. Sometimes I wonder if one should have kids at all and bring them to such a world and make them suffer so much.
I had a wonderful childhood. My family filled me with so much love, hope and optimism that it makes me wonder if that is why I turn out to be so ill-equipped to comprehend the real world. It has always been a struggle being an adult. Somewhat depressing too. The more optimistic I seem the more the world has offered to show its not so nice faces and made me a tad bit cynical. It is not easy when people let you down, when situations are always adverse, when things dont go your way. Where does one seek solace? The world really isnt as wonderful as I had imagined as a child. Adults have real problems, bills to pay, work to do, and no time for fun. BORING. To the core. That is what life is.
You have one problem. You overcome it. You have one more. This is during the good times.
Sometimes another problem shows up before the first one goes away. Sometimes a hell lot of them appear out of no where and you struggle and struggle and after you pass out from exhaustion they seem to go leaving you more cynical and far less fun than you once used to be. Sometimes the problems are not even yours. People around you dump them on you if you are the responsible sorts. Being responsible or having such an image is the worst. Life is not one bit interesting, even if everyone seems to be posting the fanciest pics on fb. Life is a big mess, an eternal drag. It is neither fair nor just. You suddenly appear one day and remain clueless for the rest of your life. You cannot live by yourself nor for yourself. You are taught as a kid to live by some rules. As an adult you are shocked no one else seems to be following those rules and the ones who really do end up losing in the game of life.
Each day lived is one less day to live and you get closer to the end, whatever that means.
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