Mein aisa hee hu...

I have been quite busy with work from past few weeks. Every morning getting up early, getting ready and running to office seems such a herculean task. I hate myself for doing it. There is a shuttle later in the morning at around 10,(the one I catch is in the wee hours of the morning - at 8!) but I somehow feel its too late a time to go to office. If I go at that time I cant peacefully look at the mails and reply to them. I have tried it before, but never felt at ease.

Yesterday I got up quite late owing to the fact that I was absorbed in a nice book the previous night. When I looked at the clock, I gave up all hopes of catching the bus. But something in me said why not give it a shot. I dont know why, but I got real excited and started getting ready. To my pleasant surprise, I did everything so orderly, thought so clearly,everything fell in place so well and I reached the bus stop to catch the bus in time.Yeah! I patted my back for it!

So last evening pleased with myself I decided to master the new art. I woke up late today,actually I woke up early but felt assured about not missing the bus and so slept again. I messed up so much and it was my great fortune I caught the bus. If I had missed it I would to find that rare obliging auto fellow(these species are on the verge of extinction in B'lore!) to take me to office! I couldnt have done anything crazier(underestimating myself??). God,why am I the way I am?
But you know what? Such things only make life more interesting in the otherwise mechanical workdays.

Life goes on....

When someone in my team leaves its always hard to take it. Without our knowledge we tend to become used to people we work with. Its not always that you like everybody, but with considerable amount of time spent, you get accustomed to people and their ways. I am a part of a team where we need to interact very often with other team-mates. I have been around for slightly less than a year now. Just months after I joined a team-mate left. I almost found myself in tears! Now, I accept the fact much more easily, but its always sad. Tomorrow again another team-mate is moving out and we are all going to miss him,he was so much fun to be with, and as he says "life goes on.."hmm...

Nostalgia

I have a liking for Indian stuff in English. Anything to do with something that I can relate to, always has interested me.I guess this is a very natural thing. No doubt I used to devour all those books-Secret seven,Nancy Drew, Hardy boys et cetera(RK style!), but there was a strange enjoyment whenever I read R K Narayan. These days I am just refreshing the joy by reading and re-reading some of his books. The characters in his novels always seem so familiar. Swami doing his assignments always reminds me of myself. I used to write "pages of handwriting" on monday morning, before hurrying off to school!There has been one other writer(or rather a columnist) whose writings have similar effect on me. He is V Gangadhar who writes a column called "slice of life" in The Hindu's sunday editions. I have always looked forward for his columns. I remember reading his articles ever since I was in school. Even now he writes, but I dont get to see it every sunday, I sometimes even miss his column.Their writings carry the same familiarity. I seem to know these people personally! The people,their ways,their mentality,dishes,clothes all these that one gets to read in their works all seem so down to earth, so ordinary, so mundane.Gangadhar opens his life and experiences to the readers. I know so many things about him and his tastes by merely reading his articles. There is a sense of deja vu.And ofcourse Keshav's cartoons bring all these characters in his articles to life. Just like Laxman's does to RK's novels. Wow what a similarity! These could also have helped my young mind to imagine these things better and enjoy them.

En-lightenment!

The other day I felt bad because I felt very sad when someone had questioned the very way I do things. It might not have been intentional at all, it just could have been a casual remark, and may be I took it the wrong way. But it did make me think..

There are several things in life which we think we love. I always felt I loved my job(even now mostly I do), because, it gave me a sense of security, made me "acceptable" among friends, gave a purpose during all those days after graduation when you dont know what to do with yourself! I had so many reasons. And I never felt like questioning myself, even once. This was not where I wanted to be when I was young. I always dreamt of becoming someone else. And no one forced me to be what I am. I had chosen my career. And I felt I should never regret anything, stand by all my decisions.

Hey, its not that I dont like what I am doing any more. I surely enjoy it, but certainly dont love it for the same reasons. I understand that its not the job I love, its that "occupation" of my mind while doing things that keeps me free from the anything to do with the rest of the world and yes certainly for the reason that it gives me things to do between weekends! (I read this on a poster). There is no need to feel overly about anything/anybody. I realize that there is no need to justify any feeling/belief of yours that gets contradicted at times. And there is certainly no need to tell myself to keep "loving" it. There is no point. When you feel like you have "had enough", feel free to feel it. When you enjoy doing something, enjoy the feeling to the core without any regrets, without any guilt. I am understanding that one shouldnt try dictating ones feelings and thoughts always. There are so many things beyond us.Like there are several things and people I have loved all my life without knowing why, and I still do. May be thats how life is.

Crushes???

As a teenager, I used to have so many crushes. On an average, one every month. It continued to be like that until recently.Now I wonder why it isnt that way. It was very strange. All these people were celebs of some magnitude, I never had met them, I never wished to meet them! It was just that I loved to watch them (either on TV/the bigscreen) or listen to them. It was sheer excitement.
One of my biggest crushes (in the sense that it lasted for many months!) was on channel[v] VJ Purab. He used to host this show called "CRUSH" and I had a crush on him! I liked everything about him, the way he spoke, the way he looked, and absolutely everything about him. Even now I like him, but I am not as crazy as I used to be! He seems to be very talented. The last I heard about him (doesnt that make you feel I know him personally!) was that he acted in Sanjay Suri's film My brother Nikhil. I am not very sure but I guess he played a homosexual in that film!
Then the next longest one was probably Sonu (Nigam). I was very crazy about his voice. He has a magic in his voice. I used to like "Yeh dil" from Pardes a lot. Now I sometimes dont like the very way he looks! Those long hair,my god! He used to look so cute with that neat haicut. Well I certainly shouldnt comment about other peoples' hair-styles given the fact that I experiment with it myself! Thats a different story altogether.That will probably need a dedicated space on my blog..hmmm?? But I still like his songs.
The list can go on... I am not even sure whether these crazy fascinations of having imaginary relationships with non-existent people(they never belonged to my world!) can even be called "crushes", but I always called them so, it made the feeling all the more interesting! Usually when people have crushes on celebs they are so eager to meet them in person. But I never felt I wanted to meet them some day! When any of my friends asked me this question it was outright "no way!". Crazy me!

Men and women

Some funny stuff I read...

WHO DOES WHAT

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning. The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee." The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee." Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee." Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me." So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says.......... "HEBREWS"

THE SILENT TREATMENT

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up." Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece. Though I am not a hard core feminist I feel there is truth in this statement!

Know thyself!

These days I am getting a lot of mails from friends who send me these crazy links that will tell me more about myself! Meaning these will be some kinds of tests and the answers will be analised and I will be enlightened about myself. I took one called "Dr.Phil's test", another to find out if I am in love or not(hmm!!!), yet another that analised me based on my date of birth and so on. Inspite of being busy the whole week I would somehow make time and take these tests. Was it that I dint know myself or was it that I was eager if the world had really come up with things that could guage the real me based on a few facts that i provide, is still a question. But I enjoyed doing all this! I realised one thing from these tests. Anything that arouses a person's curiosity saying it can tell who "I" am sells!

Coffee...

I wasnt this crazy about coffee until a couple of years ago. I always wondered why people loved this drink the way they do. At home I had always seen my mom start her day with a hot cup of coffee. And beleive me there are thousands of people who are real crazy about this drink..

Now even I start my day with a cup of this heaven! Unlike most other people I like my coffee not very hot. It cant be called hot also! Its a little hotter than what is called warm and a little colder than what is called hot! Ya, I am so particular about its temperature as well! Crazy me!

Coffee has even inspired a recent talk show to be named after it. Koffee with Karan, and Karan Johar dint spare even the humble coffee. He added a 'K' to it as well! See dint I tell you Koffee can be Krazy! And with so many cool looking coffee shops I guess coffee is no longer that humble drink.

And coffee has this very romantic association with mornings and newspapers! What a way to start your day with hot (not that very!) cup of coffee reading your favorite newpaper!

But let me tell you, too much of anything isnt good as well. This is from my own experience. I used to down cups of it when I felt very sleepy. Its a diuretic. It can cause gastric disorders, prevents one from getting hungry and the list goes on...

Hmm.. my strong admiration for coffee dint diminish anyways. I take it in the right amount and enjoy it now. So herez some space on my blog for this special drink!

Radio city..

Yesterday I felt I should write about my 10 month old companion on the move. I get to hear radio city every morning when I am on my way to office and every evening on my way back home. I travel in a bus. The only time I dont enjoy it is when I need to talk over the phone.
I like Daraius! The way he amuses people who call him to request for a song is great. I remember a particular evening when it was raining, he played songs that had rain as the theme and I loved it. So thoughtful of him! He makes those really nice evenings , wrongly spent stuck in traffic jams, inching through the mad rush of vehicles heading home after a day's work on the Hosur road, pleasant. Had it not been for some nice music, getting stuck in a traffic would have been absolutely frustrating!

Vasanthi, the RJ of the morning show once asked who among the following does a woman feel is very possessive about her : father,brother,boyfriend or husband? Instantly I felt the answer was the "father". Then I realized how could I even conclude as I did not have a brother or a boyfriend or a husband. But I was curious to know what Bangalore felt. Then when I got into the bus that evening Daraius brought up the issue and said he would annouce the results of the poll. It was a pleasant surprise, as I had forgotten all about it. And guess what Bangalore agreed with me!

Some crap!

Oh god! its already 7.30 in the evening and i dont feel tired at all. Usually at this hour when I am in office I feel tired. I have been checking my mailbox for a while..none of my friends seem to be free! no mails? no forwards? what happened to the world all of a sudden? and work..its happening..very slowly..thats because i have been doing it that way..i read a few blogs of other people..pretty interesting.
Now I am off to canteen..i hear my stomach rumbling! :)

The chair

Here is something nice I read today:

An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing with a
broad array of topics. The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist." Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled in furious fashion. Some students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the existence of the chair. One member of the class however, was up and finished in less than a minute. Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered how he could have
gotten an A when he had barely written anything at all. His answer consisted of two words: "Which chair?"

My musings about first impressions and second chances

Man, its been a long time since I wrote something on my blog(BTW I havent written anything at all so far!)...I always get some ideas..so there is something I felt strongly about today.. so here it is..

I always wonder why "first impression" has so much of importance attached to it. It shows the human nature of trying to be decisive and the strong inclinination to be keenly judgmental. People always want tend to carry this "baggage" about others. And how many times are we able to judge any person precisely by the first impressions about them.

I beleive that everybody deserves a "second" chance, even yourself, for you should give yourself a second chance before judging a person.Everyday we meet people, some of whom we "like" and some whom we "dislike". Or rather we decide to "like" or "dislike" somebody. And more often than not we want to keep it that way. Ofcourse each of us have this right and no one can dictate things to anybody.

There are several times when we have to be with some people whether we like it or not. But give it a thought. What is the use of passing a judgement about anyone? Why should my past experiences become a hurdle in my day-to-day interaction. Why cant each day be taken as it comes, each person be taken as is? Why should I not be good even when the other person, whom I thought I hated is trying to be good to me? Is it my ego that prevents me from being friendly. If thats the case what good is it of? Put yourself in the other person's shoes.How many of us would like it if people judged us for every action of ours?

Each of us need our "space".

Hmm..on second thoughts,(again "second"?) there were many questions and few answers..One last question..should all these "first"s and "second"s matter at all and do they really make our everyday life better?

my first blog

Hi,
I am writing my first blog. I have always wanted to write...its a wonderful way of expression.