Sulking and how!

May I say, I have sent my "hope" for servicing, so sulking big time today. :P

I really liked the thought, so here it goes in the blog!

The Illusionist...

Watched the movie last evening. A period film. Nice plot, my smile was intact when the curtains fell. Enjoyed. I have seen a few movies with a similar feel, but this was released back in 2006 and may be had I watched it back then, I may have found it quite novel.

Theatre

Author : W. Somerset Maugham

She is the greatest actress of her times in England and yet Julia Lambert leads a very lonely life in a loveless marriage. When she is on stage, she delightfully engrosses the audience - pure genius.
A whimsical consent to having tea with a persistent young fan changes her life and opens up a stormy romance. The immensely talented woman, with a great reputation for being a loyal wife indulges passionately with the young lover. So much is at stake. She is middle aged and he is a few years older than her son. She realises that the love is not as much from the other end. How does she get a grip and deal with it? Does she emerge sane and sound after the stormy affair, is the rest of the plot.

Brilliant. I kept hoping for Julia even when she was doing what seemed outright foolish, that is what Maugham does, he doesnt let you(the reader) leave the protagonist's side even when you feel they are doing things they ought not to do. Maugham helps you understand the protagonist so well that it feels very natural what they do, since you know why exactly they do.
Absolute delight if you are a Maugham fan.

Writing...

I sometimes wonder how, many a time, my expressions are heavily borrowed by all that I have read over the years. Do I really feel like that or is it that these come closest to what I could put in words – I am not sure. I guess as a reader, one enjoys a certain passage, when we come across word associations that are not common, and that take our imagination much closer to what the writer visualized - almost to the level of actually viewing the scene or the reader gets such an illusion (:P), that is what is wonderful. 

Previously I would just enjoy writing even if I used many clichéd expressions as long as they were what I wanted to say, but clichéd none the less. Probably the clichés were intentional, to make myself familiar with those word patterns. Now I feel I should try writing in a way that can be called my writing style. A style originates when a perspective is translated aptly into words. Since my perspective of everything is different from anyone else (the truth, the world, anything and everything  can be quite different in my perception, you see) my writing style, if nurtured in all its rawness might be interesting! J Does that mean I don’t have a writing style yet? Well, no, I may or may not have. What I mean is till now I have not been a conscious writer. I mostly write to capture my comments on a certain event. There is a trigger and the writing is my response, a response I would like to keep track of, and hence goes in to the blog. It is more anecdotal. I want to(or rather wish to) intensify my observations to details. Shift the focus. Hold the view long enough to let the writing cover the scene as close to as I saw it. There is also an observation on my criticism skills – when I like something, I like it – I cannot pick loopholes in it, it is not that I avoid it, it is that I am blind to it. So if as an observer I hold my attention a little longer, I may see the drawbacks as well, or would I? That is something I need to try a little more. Aha. Now, what do I write on? 

Happiness and repetition...

I was reading the last few pages of “The unbearable lightness of being”. A phrase struck me, “happiness is the longing for repetition”. My initial reaction was like “Really!?” and slowly the thought started getting more agreeable.

From a young age, I associated life to be exciting if new things happened in life all the time. I was raised in a small sleepy town and I don’t think I believed my life was very interesting back then. But when I look back, I had one of the most amazing childhoods, a kid can have.

Each year of primary school felt more or less the same. I may have learnt new stuff at school and read different books every year – but same set of friends, same teachers, same school building, same play mates, same pets, same summer classes even. I yearned for change and exploration. Waiting as I was, with the first opportunity I got, I packed my bags and left for the city. Whenever I got a chance, I explored places. A few times, I welcomed opportunities that gave me a chance to relocate for work. I enjoyed staying in the new places for a while. Then I had to come back. I turned out more rooted than I had fancied. Even in Bangalore, I stayed in a number of localities. Last few years I have had a lot of changes, traveled and explored a great deal - more than ever in my life. 

Now I seem to yearn for my “old” life – a settled existence. If as a child, someone had told me how lucky it is to have a simple, normal, "boring" life, I would not have believed! Being nomadic isn’t glamorous at all to me now. Am done with wanting life to be an adventure every day. I want repetition of normalcy, of being surrounded by loved ones, of a simple existence, every day so much like the other – simple and content. Somehow it makes a lot of sense to me. It was as if those thoughts had been brewing inside for a while and suddenly reading those lines in the book, made me aware of my own thoughts.