Morning I woke up so very late. I had gone to some colleague’s kid’s birthday party(I seriously wonder “how” I even get invited to kid’s parties, it was not a direct invite, my roomie needed company and she got me invited!) So there I was playing with so many kids, some toddlers even. Kids seem to take to me like ducks to water. Ya, knowing well that they head back to their homes and me to mine at the end of all of it, I like to spend time with kids this way. So I thoroughly enjoyed myself, played, ate, got exhausted and slept like a rock. Morning I wake up to see I am late. Oh my god! And not a soul at home, everyone has gone to office. I panicked, then relaxed, then again panicked, got out of bed, worked out mentally whats the fastest way of doing things to catch the next bus. When I was brushing I found myself very angry with my room mate, there I was last night attending the party for her, but could she not have bothered to wake me up in the morning. Damn everyone. I ofcourse had enjoyed myself, but …Oh god, all my thoughts had taken over 3 minutes of my time and I was still holding the brush and moving gently all the time. I cursed myself, because I take a long time to brush and cant do it in a hurry. I decided in the next ten minutes am dressed and ready. It took me another four minutes more than my estimate, but I pulled my socks and jacket, searched for the house key. And my shoes seem to have some problem when I am in a hurry. Could see the bus coming, from the glass of the balcony and ran like crazy.(Every time I run like this for the bus along the way I remember Shah RukhKhan running in some movie with a long over coat with a bag on his shoulder, in some dumb movie I cant remember the name, but I remember he looked awesome, my coat is not long but even I have a bag on my shoulder, but I somehow remember that scene every time I am running for the bus. It makes me feel from the other side he may be coming running – damn it - a very wrongly timed thought that just pops up…huh almost everytime!). The bus goes all the way down my road, takes a U turn and comes in front of my apartment and there is another stop at a few minutes’ walk. I ran to that one, caught the bus finally. I was somehow disturbed. This is not a way to start my Monday morning. I watched movies over the weekend, dint do the laundry, ironing stuff – on top of it partied. I should be responsibly enjoying my weekend. I don’t have maids to do everything. I cant be wearing smelly socks and un-ironed clothes. I will have to take some time off every day to plan for the next, for the rest of the week. Damn it! Oops I was hungry. But the bus ride somehow soothes me and within minutes I had closed my eyes and enjoying the speed of the vehicle on the freeway!
Then I headed to Starbucks got myself a hot chocolate, at 9am my stomach was rumbling empty. A few sips of it at my desk and I was sane and at peace. I suddenly felt a joy of realization. Here I am, with no one to blame, every action of mine is only my own doing. In Bangalore it was different, I wonder why, but it was different. But here not many attachments, everything is more or less logical. So blame it all on myself. But anything good I do is also all mine. I have never been my own responsibility to this extent. Never. It is not going to last forever I know. So have fun as long as it lasts. One last time I want to say “Damn it all” and take a deep breath. Now am good to go and have a great day. (A big smile on my face)
p.s: this was written last monday!
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2 comments:
"Ya, knowing well that they head back to their homes and me to mine at the end of all of it, I like to spend time with kids this way."..
Haaa the 'joy' without 'responsibilities'..;-)
Njoy the sense of responsibility (or is it the lack of it? ;-) haha just kidding), the happiness and the joy of living alone till it lasts..:)
And hopefully after that you will see the better side of things here (whatever that may be!! ;-)) and will continue having the big smile on your face! :)
thanks for the wishes, its wonderful! :)
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