Some musings on human bondage :)

There was a time when I thought bonding with friends was easier. It sometimes may be. As kids we are close to family first, then as we grow up we make friends in school and our interactions are no more confined to the safe environment of the home. As teenagers we start experimenting more with the kind of friends we make. Those are probably the times one feels that people you are not related to are easier to bond with!

But as one grows older, it seems rather easier to catch up with family. Even with siblings, moving on and with changed priorities(both of yourself and of the other), it never feels like there was a total disconnect or awkwardness of meeting someone after a while. Even if we do not meet all the time, somehow there is something that keeps that bond intact. - catching up on phone or chat and other family members keeping you updated on everybody else, somehow you know. There is no need to prove that you care, and these are the people who knew you as kids and so they are kind enough to overlook your not so pleasing idiosyncrasies. All the time you spent quarreling with your siblings or arguing with your parents was an investment well made! This would have lead to enrichment of mutual knowledge bases - of which buttons trigger what kinds of reactions and such things.

I had a friend in school, who would easily forget her school friends because of the number of cousins she had , they made up for most of her friend circle. Even with all the technology around to easily connect, she is totally off my radar, and I am guessing she is happy in her own world filled with family, first and second and third cousins, it may be too much to deal with friends from the outside world. In my growing up years I felt, she was missing out since she was not networking enough with friends, but now I feel she may have done a very smart thing investing so much of time in extended family. Since these people would be sharing same social and cultural backgrounds as her and have a history of knowing each other for so long, it must be rewarding to have a close knit extended family.

Many of the friends I made, during my growing up years and then in college are only in touch on FB. It is so superficial to even be called friendships, given that some of these people were very close during those times. It is too time consuming to have too many close friends, I know. But what am saying is my set of close friends also kept changing over years. People get practical and bond more with people who are part of their day to day lives and it takes immense effort from both sides to keep a friendship alive if this is not the case. And then one day the closest friends turned out to be family! Since they were the closest for the longest amount of time! While the thought makes me sad that some of those friends seem no longer as close as they once were(I can bet, if we meet for lunch or dinner I can get along with each one of these friends like a house on fire, but how often does it happen is what makes me sad), its heartening to know that the same people whom I had taken for granted for so long, just because they are my family, continue to be giving, loving, caring and having me in their prayers.

Mountain biking....

I was on a holiday to Leh, Ladhak, Jammu and Kashmir for the last 11 days or so.  What was I doing? Well I was on a mountain biking trip J How cool is that! The bikes aka the geared cycles were extremely good for the terrain and it was a wonderful experience. The best part of biking in the mountains is the meditative aspect. The terrains are tough and the weather in Leh is ruthless to the extent of literally sucking up all the moisture your body dares to expose. If you breathe through your mouth instead of the nose, the food pipe dries up! The dehydration left to itself can cause depression is what I heard, so even to keep oneself sane, one needs to hydrate as often! The early mornings and late evenings are chilly and the late mornings and noons are unbearably hot(for a Bangalorean i.e) and dryness is irrespective of day or night. Given the fact that I had all the time in the world, I became very aware of the body and mind. Any physical activity under extreme weather conditions is a mind game to begin with. 

The first day of the trail run(it was about 25kms!) I just wondered what on earth made me enroll for this, it felt very tough and I felt very unfit. The next day I was far more comfortable and by the fifth day the bike and me were almost so much in sync it was difficult not to believe I hadn’t done mountain biking before in my life. I learnt to synchronize breathing patterns with pedaling the bike, handle the steepness of the mountains with the bike, learnt to negotiate the hair pin bends. 

The roads - the roads in Ladhak deserve a special mention. They are extremely good, better than the roads in metros may be! The biking experience in Leh can be said to be of supremely high quality because of the excellent roads! Three cheers to the roads! :)

The azure skies provide a sense of calm that can only be experienced.

And the sense of accomplishment is so awesome. Imagine climbing mountains with your raw physical power for a fuel, what in the world can match that! The travel and the adventure add to the fun. The whole ride was on NH1 and most of the route was next to the Indus river! Scenic. Fantastic. Breath-takingly beautiful. I would highly recommend the experience. It is a doer’s delight. At the end of it all, you not only get a sense of accomplishment, you also get a toned body – that is a big bonus now, isn’t it!

June...

June has been kind of a special month during my growing up years. Unlike many kids, I was very eager to get back to school after the summer holidays. (We did not have exams till Class 7, that may explain the strange phenomenon!). I enjoy environments where there is hardly any attempt to enforce restrictions. I do have limitations which cause restrictions - but that are my own realities, some even imagined, but still my own. Anything enforced is not often appreciated! So school that way was fun in my growing up years.

June also happens to be the month, we moved to our own house and I remember some ceremonies on that day very distinctly. I was only 11 and the frock that I had worn on the day remained a favourite for quite a while although I outgrew it within a very short time!

There is also my parents wedding anniversary in June. Over the years, I do not remember it being celebrated grandly, although it is special for the family. This year is it was very special. My parents became grand parents on the very day. That made the day indeed grand! We had a new arrival to the family - my little nephew! I am not sure how much people change when they become parents or grand parents - rather it is the priorities that may change more than the people themselves. I had not thought about how having a nephew would influence me, I had just thought it would be fun having a baby in the family. I have been wondering about it last couple of days and have a faint feeling that something may have actually changed!

When I held him for the first time in my arms it was a strange happy feeling. That was the first time I was seeing a baby minutes after birth. I was very curious. He was crying when the nurse handed him to me and he stopped crying as soon as he was in my arms. I was very surprised that the nurse thought I could handle such a precious little baby. I was a little scared, but when he stopped crying and seemed content in my arms, I was amazed and joyous at the same time. Did he understand that sense of belonging? Why did he stop crying? That very gesture made the moment special, and it is going to stay with me. I plan to tell him this when he grows up! :) "I love you kiddo. "